Saturday, 19 October 2019

Miraculous healing with Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse


The Gift of the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse that Sree Maa Shri Ji share with the world is absolutely priceless. It is impossible to find the right words to describe something that is so Supreme, Gracious, Benevolent and Loving.

One of the reasons that i knew from the start this was different, the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse was unlike anything i had experienced before is the following. 

Since i was about 15 had been struggling with an eating disorder, first anorexia and this later turned into b.e.d., binge eating disorder. This dominated my life and my thinking, my whole day pretty much revolved around eating and exercise. Had tried almost everything under the sun to overcome this eating disorder, all kinds of therapies and all sorts of new age modalities, but nothing worked…

Then everything changed when Sree Maa Shri Ji came into my life and graced me with a 24/7 connection to the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. It was a watershed moment on many fronts but one of the amazing things that happened was that the eating disorder just went away like that without me having to do anything. It melted like snow in the sun!

The way Sree Maa explained it is that while tuning in with the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse the connection between the Antaryami and my shuddha Atma (pure Soul) became so strong, that the issue that was in the sukshma sharir (the subtle body) just dropped away. The Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse that was spreading through me went in to such an extent while It was being shared that It created a cellular shift, plus the water in which the programme of the eating disorder was held got released.

This kind of spontaneous miraculous can happen with the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse by the Utmost Grace and Will of the Absolute.



This most beautiful Signature of the Source-Void, this amazing Gift is available to humanity right now by the loving Grace of Sree Maa Shri Ji to support all who are ready to receive in their spiritual path of awakening, transformation and transcendence 

Forever indebted and grateful to Sree Maa Shri Ji, truly the living embodiment of Grace and Compassion _/\_ _/\ô__

Utopian oneness

Love and oneness - sounds beautiful doesn’t it? i was a believer in a utopian oneness, the kind of ‘one love, one light, one happy world’. It is a belief that circulates a lot in new age circles. When i joined the FiT Programme, this belief came with me.

i saw everyone through this lens and believed that all the other people who joined the FiT Programme came with the same genuine intention. But i was wrong. There is no one universal path and one universal way as on this planet everyone is different, the gradation of souls is different. Yet i kept believing in this oneness and not adequately reflecting on the precious teachings Sree Maa was giving. 

At the start of the Retreat in 2016, Sree Maa told us about the Samudra Manthan in which there were devas (heavenly beings) and danavas (demonic beings), but i never looked if there were possibly any danavas sitting in our group…

As it turned out there were. Some of ones who joined the FiT Programme came with devious hidden intentions of stealing and destruction and sadly they never changed, though they were given the most gracious opportunity to do so. For a very long time i was completely oblivious to this and trusted each one completely.

All this while i was wearing these rose coloured glasses and kept believing in this oneness, which gave the toxic people the opportunity to manipulate me and use me. They would steal credit, would marginalize and minimize me, would come up with excuses to make me all do the work and i didn’t mind as i thought we are doing this as one team for the mission of Kosmic Fusion.

Because of my trusting nature and false beliefs, i failed to clue on to what was really going on and did not realize that people are not exactly what they show. Some of the toxic ones were subtly spreading their poison in the group, creating disharmony and driving people away.

Sree Maa was enduring a lot of harassment at the hands of the toxic ones in the Ashram and i only woke up to this once their masks were literally falling off as i was living in some lala land. 


Never asked the right questions or joined the dots even though there were moments and clues where i could have woken up and smelled the coffee. This is not about judging others but coming from clarity and discernment is important.  

It is my own nature that made me fail to see clearly and take action when some of the people were damaging the mission of Kosmic Fusion. When we cling to false beliefs it can be very damaging. 

Oneness at the level of the world is impossible. Oneness at the level of Atma, True Self is another matter. The potential of the Absolute is present in each one. In the 2015 Retreat we had experienced such priceless fusion and love through the most Gracious initiations bestowed by Sree Maa Shri Ji which i will humbly write about in another blog.

Thursday, 13 June 2019

Interviews with my dear kalyan mitras


Earlier this year flew down to Sydney to meet with my dear kalyan mitras to reflect back on our phenomenal journey of the last couple of years with beloved Sree Maa Shri Ji in the FiT Programme and Kosmic Fusion.

There is so much to share but in my humble understanding the essence of it is unfathomable Grace, Sree Maa Shri Ji's pure Grace, Compassion and Kindness and total selflessness that has propelled us onto and forward on the journey towards our True SELF, the Brahmroop. Even though we have made many mistakes due to our inner weaknesses and flaws, learning at the expense of Sree Maa Shri Ji and Kosmic Fusion, Sree Maa never let go of our hands and keeps ushering forward. With the GPS installed, the most benevolent Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse shared unconditionally by Sree Maa Shri Ji, and the Shelter of Sree Maa Shri Ji's gracious Wing we are most fortunate to be on the path of liberation Homebound.

Welcome you to watch our frank and heartfelt interviews about our transformational journeys:

















 Please stay tuned, more interviews coming :)

Sunday, 19 May 2019

Can a narcissist be a non-doer?

One of the key conditions of sharing the most benevolent Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse has always been: be the non-doer. This means no intentions, no invocations, no expectations, really stepping back and letting the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse step in. IT is All-Knowing and knows exactly what is required for both the sharer and recipient, on all levels, in all dimensions, timelines and beyond. It is Supreme Grace in action. This golden rule was repeated by Sree Maa again and again and the FiT Programme was a blessed training ground to learn how to be the non-doer truly and fully. This golden rule was also spoken by Bhagwan Shri Krishna when he told Arjuna on the battlefield, just do your action but don't be concerned with the fruits of your action.



Yet not all who joined the FiT Programme were able or even wanted to move into this beautiful zone of the non-doer, especially the ones who had very strong narcissistic tendencies. Iphigenie (now calling herself Malana) had the great fortune to be part of the FiT Programme, yet she was obsessed with the need to be in control - one of the key characteristics of narcissists. Something she hid for a long time, as covert narcissists do but in front of Absolute Truth one cannot hide...

Power brokers
If you break down a narcissist’s games into its simplest form, it is all about power and control. They need to feel all powerful and better than you. They will seek to dominate every individual and every group they interact with. This is exactly what Iphigenie did. She wanted to be top dog and played the leader amongst the FiT in New Zealand. She wanted special powers, only to feel good about herself and not to help others. All this is about the narcissist’s grandiose. The same happened with Joy Kuo in Sydney, who went to great lengths to establish herself as a leader, playing all the narc games in the book
– including gaslighting, triangulation, playing the martyr -  to control others, become the face of Kosmic Fusion and get the fame and fortune she was after. All this is a far cry away from being the non-doer.



The search for power and control is an old one. Recently read the beautiful story about Bhakta Prahlad, whose father Hiranyakashipu was the king of asuras and wanted to dominate and control the entire universe. Guess in the ancient times they were called asuras and rakshas, the term nowadays would be narcissists. 

In any case, both Iphigenie and Joy wanted to use the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse (QVSWPP) for their own selfish, devious aims. However, they forgot that the QVSWPP cannot be abused. It is the Mother of All Energies, Frequencies and Vibrations, the Master Controller. You can misuse the name to try and mislead others, but IT can never be abused. The moment you step in, the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse steps out. When you think you know and can do it, the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse says okay, steps out and leaves you to it.

Truth comes out
Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse is most gracious and benevolent, shuns no one and gives everyone the chance to change. Many years Iphigenie and Joy got on the FiT Programme to let go of their need to control and move into the non-doer and their higher potential. Many miracles they witnessed with the QVSWPP and the phenomenal transformations that can happen when you step back and let the Grace of Bhagwan touch you. However, they both held on to their desire for power and control and continued to covertly abuse others and to try and control & abuse the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. Towards the end, all the good they projected to hide their insidious intents and games went away and their evil face came out. 

Narcissists cannot handle their true face being exposed and will without fail resort to a smear campaign, projecting themselves as the victim and the real victims as the abusers. This is also exactly what Iphigenie and Joy did in a vain attempt to gain back power and control in their head and prep up their fake image. The loss is entirely theirs.

The joy of the non-doer state
Having witnessed all this and taking into account my own experience, a powerful lesson an realization emerges. Being the non-doer takes practice. Have found in my own experience that when you focus too much on the shades of the doer and try to peel the layers of the onion, you lose sight of the joy that comes out of the non-doer a state, a state which is so effortless to move into by simply tuning in with the most benevolent Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse without any intentions or expectations. Forever grateful to Sree Maa for sharing this most precious Gift of Grace with humanity.

Saturday, 18 May 2019

A narcissist's malicious web of lies

Anyone who knows a little bit about narcissism knows that narcissists are pathological liars. Below image sums up well why they lie and that they don't feel bad about it either.


Will share about one such lie that was part of a smear campaign by a narcissist after she was asked to leave due to her highly destructive behaviour for many years. Iphigenie Amoutzias, now going under the name Malana Taresi doing some flower essences in Germany, has claimed in media interviews and podcasts she was surprised the FiT Programme turned “all Hindu” in 2016.

All this is just a ploy on the part of a malignant narcissist to spread lies and confusion, make herself look innocent and the other party look questionable. They are cunning and clever but cannot stand in front of the facts, in front of the Truth.

First of all, before Iphigenie came to Kosmic Fusion, she was a Buddhist for 20 years (!). She talked about how she had been a Buddhist leader who guided others, so in that case her knowledge about Buddhism must have been pretty solid. She must have known about the concepts of karma, reincarnation and that Buddhism has its origins in Hinduism, or a more correct word for this is Sanatana Dharma, the eternal way of righteous living.

None of us were ever surprised that the FiT Programme was based on Sanatana Dharma because Sree Maa has always been very transparent. Straight away Sree Maa has spoken about being the non-doer and used the word akarmi. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that is a Sanskrit word…

In the FiT Programme trial intake in 2013 it was most clear this was about Sanatana Dharma, as Sree Maa spoke about chakras, karma, dharma, the atma, reincarnation, the small self (jivatma), the true SELF (Brahmn) and many other concepts from Sanatana Dharma and mentioned Sanatana Dharma itself. In facebook posts and messages shared with all FiTs in 2013 Sree Maa wrote at the end OM Sai Brahman. We were introduced to the greeting Hari OM Brahmn in 2014, silent Guru mantra was given in 2015, well before that she was graced with a new name Meera to support her in her spiritual journey, which is the name of a great devotee of Lord Krishna. Think the picture is crystal clear here. She is lying through her teeth that things all of a sudden turned Hindu. Sanatana Dharma always was the very basis.

Then the other question is. If she had such trouble with it like she is now claiming, why did she stay? Everyone was always free to leave. In fact, there are some who left as they felt the FiT Training was no longer resonating with them, no judgement, no questions asked. And why did she come on a trip to India to visit temples as late as 2017 when this too was completely optional, some of the group didn’t come.

Nothing was ever co-erced. Before each initiation we were given the choice, at the end of each year we were encouraged to reflect to see if this was still our path. But then after she was asked to leave the FiT Programme and Kosmic Fusion mid 2017 due to her highly unethical and malignant behaviour that had come to light, she runs to the media to take revenge and goes around saying it all turned Hindu.



It is clear this is just a question of sour grapes and most of all she is trying to slander and malign the reputation of Kosmic Fusion to keep other people away from Kosmic Fusion. While in the FiT Programme she was trying to veer others off course and get them out (see this blog) as her mission in her own words was to destroy Kosmic Fusion. After she got found out and left, she is still trying to do the same, as summed up aptly in the below image:




P.S.
Sharing this to stand up for the truth and to raise awareness about narcissism so that innocent people don't fall victim to these wolves in sheep clothing. See also my answer to a Quora question regarding malignant narcissists.

Wednesday, 17 April 2019

My interview with Mala




Faculty Interview – Ekta

Had the great honour of meeting my dear kalyan mitras in Sydney early 2019 and Mala interviewed me about my journey with Kosmic Fusion and beloved Sree Maa Shri Ji.

You can also see this interview on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXCf67E-i-0

In this edition, Mala candidly interviews Ekta to sum up 7 years at Kosmic Fusion. Ekta is one of the very few Faculties that have grown immensely on Personal, Emotional, Mental and Spiritual levels.
Ekta has an inspiring story, in 2012 she was a single mother living in alien country, surviving on government dole; she came to know about Kosmic Fusion through common friends and was awestruck with the brochure, which in her words “was talking to her” literally.

The next 18 months changed Ekta’s life for good, she returned back to Netherlands to a job she loves, close to her parents & family  and lovely daughter who looks at mum for inspiration.

Coming from an Atheist background, it was challenging for Ekta to understand and accept spirituality however with Sree Maa as a friend, Philosopher and Guide; nothing was impossible.

In this interview, Ekta talks about her journey since knowing Sree Maa Shri Ji and shares her experiences through past 7 years, how she came to know about Kosmic Fusion, interactions with Sree Maa, teachings and most importantly lessons learnt at one of the most revolutionary programme the “Facilitators in Training”.

How long have you known Sree Maa Shri Ji?
I know them since February 2012 when I did Awakenin & Transformation workshop. At that time I had a small child and Sree Maa was very free and allowed the child into the workshop as well.
Sometimes it is very hard to put into words, but I was touched so profoundly but I had no words for it. Sree Maa came back couple of months later and we were able to join one of the Kosmic Fusion stand at the Mind, Body Spirit Festivals in Sydney.

Sree Maa Shri Ji said, just put your hands on anyone and just see what happens. It was so profound and so amazing, it was the Quantum Vortex Scalar-Wave Photon Pulse.
“At the Awakenin & Transformation workshop, Sree Maa awakens you Atma and anyone who connects with the Quantum Vortex Scalar-Wave Photon Pulse.”

We could tune in with anyone, any time, any place, 24/7. Most benevolent signature of the Source Void. It is shared by Sree Maa Shri Ji, lovingly and unconditionally.

When I put my hands on somebody’s shoulder, I could see this instant healing, expansion, feeling inner bliss and then when the testimonials that came back from the people who were so touched with Quantum Vortex Scalar-Wave Photo Pulse.

How has Sree Maa Shri Ji brought difference to your life?
I will try to keep it brief. Since knowing Sree Maa Shri Ji, they have taken me under their wings and worked with me very patiently, lovingly and compassionately. They always supported me with the right guidance. So I could become more open and in tune with the Atma (the Soul).
I was such a drama queen; till Sree Maa Shri Ji walked into my life. Because of Sree Maas grace, patience and nurturing and become more in-tune with yourself.

I can now embrace anything with love and grace. I still remember this Soul Mapping session with Sree Maa, I was told to embrace everything that comes my way, those sentences always struck by me. With all the workshops that followed, the Facilitators in Training programme, it became easier to actually live with that wave.

“The golden phrase we were told since day 1 was to step back and let Quantum Vortex Scalar-Wave Photon Pulse step in, be the Non-Doer. It has been quite a journey to embody that, I can’t say that straight from the start. I had the doer step in through Facilitators in Training programme. More teachings and insights were shared about Quantum Vortex Scalar-Wave Photon Pulse.”
It was actually easier and effortlessly came from a non-doer state not so much effort to come together.

Are Sree Maa’s teachings consistent with Ancient Eastern philosophy or change over period of time.
I could say it was always consistent. Being from atheist background, I always had these questions, What is love, Why am I here. I had sense of God or something that is greater.
There was nothing I could refer to, I dabbled into the new age groups and modalities but that wasn’t giving me the answers. So it just didn’t sit.

Then Sree Maa Shri Ji started speaking and explaining Sanatan Dharma. I felt so light and refreshing. I just knew this is it for me. Sree Maa just knows how to explain the most complex teachings to break it down to someone like me with zero background.

Do you think people will have resistance to such direct and open way of talking?
I can imagine there will be people. I was living in Sydney in 2012 and then I moved back to Netherlands in early 2014. When we were volunteering, Sree Maa Shri Ji had given this beautiful platform.

Everyone was so touched by the experiences. Part and parcel of it is, how to be the non-Doer. Sree Maa Shri Ji was very frank with giving such feedback. I have to say that my ego was little bit at that time.

I knew this is best for me, this is for the benefit of my Soul. I have to say that “Sree Maa has always always always nurtured my Soul”. Even when I was letting it down. I feel very grateful.
Yes there might be people, who might not be able to stand beyond that but that’s they are losing out.

Did you ever feel that Sree Maa indoctrinated or imposed any belief system on you?
Quite the opposite Mala. Sree Maa Shri Ji’s teachings are universal. I felt so free learning about Sanatan Dharm, which is not a religion – it is the eternal truth and righteous way of living., spiritual democracy and such a breath of fresh air.
I have seen man made religions, very dogmatic and written in a book but this (Sanatan Dharma) covers about the journey to the Soul and the Super Soul, God or Bhagwan or however you refer to the absolute. It cannot be captured in a book, it is not something dogmatic. It is the most natural thing, the Bhagwan when you say.
Living such life is a second nature. Just the way Sree Maa Shri Ji have taught that and brought us into the nature and to my life, I feel so grateful.

How was your experience with Facilitator in Training Programme?
I joined the Facilitator in Training programme in 2013 when there was a trial intake. I remember we write letters expressing your interest & pledge on how you would like to take Kosmic Fusion mission forward.

When I read my letter in front of Sree Maa Shri Ji, I had to cry. There was something like a connection in there, so deeply. I still have a lot to learn about my self.  The Facilitators in Training programme was also about the Awakenin, Transformation and Transcendence process i.e. moving from your small “self” to your True “Self”, the Brahmaroop.

Then there was shades of small self, getting in the way.  I have learnt it really helps to look honestly at your self. All the shades come up and how to move forward. I was not always honest with my self but thank to Sree Maa Shri Ji and their guidance, sense of humour and guidance, that I have been able to grow and move forward.

A lot had changed through that FiT programme.   For a while I have to say I lived in a little bit of a daze, sleepy that I had my own belief systems about love, light etc. Sree Maa Shri Ji woke me up to the truth and remove these blinkers. That is truly what sets you free, that is liberating and it’s not in judging others but it’s in discerning.
I have become very honest. I know my soul is nurtured so deeply. Everything that I have learnt from Sree Maa Shri Ji, putting it into practice more. I’m so grateful that I’m still under Sree Maa Shri Ji’s wings, they are still holding my hand.

What motivates you to take Sree Maa as your Guru, Guide and Teacher?
Sree Maa has always embraced me with so much of love, so much understanding, so much compassion. Whatever I need each moment, Sree Maa & Shri Ji have always given it unconditionally, boundlessly, lovingly.
“I have seen in the Facilitators in Training Programme, Sree Maa Shri Ji have gone above and beyond humanly possible, to give all of us in the FiT programme, to support us in our journey of Awakenin, Transformation and Transcendence.”
What are the chances that you meet someone like that? They are my supreme lifeline…. Everything!


Please also watch the interviews with my other dear kalyan mitras:

Archita: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nwiFzU-yHoM&t=5s
Niranjana: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_kRSyrj_WE

Mala: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzhhsHvMeLs

Jeeya; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XI3yKGrL3rM

Hanuman: 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVMi-Kp8XN4

Forever grateful to beloved Sree Maa Shri Ji for coming into our lives and taking us under Sree Maa Shri Ji's Wing _/\ô__

Saturday, 30 March 2019

How i have enabled narcissists


It is only in hindsight and after more than a year of reflection and research on narcissism that i am able to write about how i have contributed to all the delays to Sree Maa’s vision and the noble mission of Kosmic Fusion to share the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse with many people.

i am extremely sorry and apologize from the bottom of my heart to Sree Maa Shri Ji, to the other FiTs and to the people whom have been held back from receiving the Grace of the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. By enabling the covert narcissists that snuck into the FiT Programme have inadvertently slowed down Sree Maa and the mission of Kosmic Fusion.

Stealth bomb

Covert narcissists are very hard to spot, and they are very good at playing your weaknesses. My kalyan mitra Archita shared a quote she found about covert narcissists that i think is very apt: “covert narcissist is the worst kind of narcissist there is. Like a stealth bomb, you can’t see them coming until they have left their destruction.”

Unfortunately, narcissists are drawn to empaths and empathetic people and roam around in spiritual circles, not because they want to serve others or to work on themselves and spiritually progress but because there, they can find a large unsuspecting supply. Supply of trusting people with forgiving and kind qualities they can drain energetically and manipulate for attention and other resources as well. It is only by the Grace and protection of Sree Maa Shri Ji and the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse that i am still standing and that i am still here. 

Ignorance, unawareness and self-preservation

Having said this, the narcissists wouldn’t have been able to hijack the FiT Programme, create such havoc and harassment, had i practiced awareness, discernment and did what was right at all times. Looking back on the FiT Programme, can see how i have missed many vital cues, clues and red flags graciously raised by Sree Maa, and how my own nature got in the way.

Trusted others in the FiT Programme blindly, believing everyone had come with the same genuine intention. And this is where i fell short big time. Failed to listen thoroughly and reflect on the Teachings Sree Maa was sharing and think about how that would apply to the FiT Programme, not in the least when Sree Maa explained about devas and danavas…

Was looking within at my grey shades (and this i could have done much better too) but not paying attention to what was going on with all in the FiT Programme. Didn’t practice discernment, despite Sree Maa talking about it, and remained too self-absorbed with my own process, not taking enough interest in what was happening in other regions where FiT were living, including the Ashram House.

Completely fell for the image that Joy Kuo was projecting of a hard-working, dedicated volunteer and later on devotee. Interestingly, it is a fact that covert narcissists often come across as polite and well-behaved, as is explained in this article. There was at times evidence or behaviours from her side to the contrary but this cognitive dissonance i didn’t solve by asking the right questions or finding out what was really going on in Sydney. 

There were tensions amongst some of the FiTs at times and bullying messages from Joy and Iphigenie on the group whatsapp but where there is conflict i tend to run away or shut down instead of standing up. Chose self-preservation, not saying anything and holding on the miss goodie two shoes fakeness and my people pleasing tendencies. Narcissists are masters at deflections and projections and the lights still did not go on in my head when Iphigenie and especially Joy were playing the victim and putting others under the train.

Now, when i read the characteristics of a covert narcissists i can see that both Joy and Iphigenie literally tick all the boxes. At the time, had no clue but should have at least asked some questions and done research about narcissism when it first came to light mid 2016 that Rita/Nandini had narcissistic tendencies. It is almost uncanny how their games are exactly like you read in the textbooks about narcissism.



Arrogance 

Straight from the start Sree Maa has taught about being the non-doer; the golden rule was to step back and let the All-Knowing QVSWPP step in. The FiT Programme gave us the opportunity to practice this sincerely, but my doer and arrogance did step in at times and that paved the way for the narcissists to create chaos. For example, raised my hand at the 2016 Retreat for Bhakti Bhaav. Initially felt hesitation and didn’t feel ready at all but arrogance took over. 

What is more i was among those who attempted to write about Bhakti Bhaav following this Retreat whereas i didn’t have a clue what it was, very much a novice at it and it is something one can only offer by the Grace of Bhagwan and Satpurush. By putting up my hand and attempting to write about it, completely failed to show respect for Sree Maa Shri Ji’s paramekantik Bhakti to Bhagwan Swaminarayan which we receive most graciously as the Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. Never ever did i publish any of the drafts, but the narcissists made use of this situation to write their own flyers and promotions portraying themselves as great devotees and actually going ahead with printing it, trying to deceive innocent seekers with their lies. Sree Maa immediately put a stop to all workshops when this happened to protect innocent people.

Deep sleep 

Was so deeply asleep that for the longest time did not clue on to the subtle and sly ways in which Iphigenie was spreading her poison in the group, constantly creating confusion and planting seeds of doubts and doing everything to fulfil her mission to destroy Kosmic Fusion. Even after the India Pilgrimage where Iphigenie’s behaviour was rude and appalling and i even questioned her why she was in the Ashram, i did not approach Sree Maa to ask Sree Maa Shri Ji how is Sree Maa doing. Sree Maa travelled a lot, was out of the Ashram a lot after Iphigenie moved in and that should have been a big hint. The least i should have done was to enquire what is happening in the Ashram, show interest from the bottom of my heart about the wellbeing of my ultimate Well-Wisher. Yet i never asked.

Sree Maa was selflessly giving 1000% percent to the FiT Programme, making untold sacrifices for the benefits of the FiT, relentlessly guiding all of us towards the Brahmroop, even the ones who came with malicious intentions as Sree Maa sees the divine potential within all. But i chose to remain in my comfort zone, sit on the fence, run away or keep my blinkers on at crucial times. 

What i ended up doing is exploiting the kindness and Compassion of the one i hold most dear, beloved Sree Maa Shri Ji. Ended up enabling two covert malignant narcissists who created horrendous harassment to Sree Maa Shri Ji and also to other FiTs. Sree Maa was always protecting us, taking the attacks from the narcissists on herself, but i miserably failed to keep the side of Sree Maa when Sree Maa was silently enduring all the harassment at the Ashram House at the hands of the narcissists.



Sree Maa didn’t need any of us at all, but since we wanted to volunteer graciously gave us the opportunity. Wrote in my letter in 2013 that i wanted to serve the noble mission of Kosmic Fusion but ended up wasting Sree Maa Shri Ji’s time and delaying the mission.

It is only by the tireless Guidance and Compassion of Sree Maa that i have been able to put the pieces of the puzzle together, reflect on my behaviour and nature of the small self and the spiritual bypassing practiced. Unfortunately, it was Sree Maa and Shri Ji who had to bear the brunt. i have learnt lessons at the expense of Sree Maa Shri Ji. There is no way i can ever apologize enough or make amends for what i have done. Can only honestly resolve to not repeat the same wrongs and mistakes ever. Am most fortunate to still be able to be associated with Kosmic Fusion as a faculty and forever endebted to Sree Maa Shri Ji for everything, for awakening my true Soul, for protecting me, for ushering me forward.

Sree Maa has given us everything on a platter including the most beautiful Absolute Truth teachings, and the most benevolent Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse. Resolve to learn from my mistakes and give it my best to truly serve the most noble mission of Kosmic Fusion.